Why did he feel this way?
He wanted to kill him. Wanted to see him dead. He didn't care anymore. It was strange. Only a short time ago, he hadn't felt this way. He had always felt off in the group of men, but he hadn't wanted anyone dead. A switch had been flipped in his spirit, and he didn't care about Jesus. He cared about the one thing he had never been able to achieve.
Power. Success. Money. Riches.
They were all eating. Judas shoved a piece of dried fruit into his mouth, and then washed it down with a swig of wine. He wanted out of here.
"Truly, I say to you, one of you will betray me." Judas perked up at Jesus' words. What was this now? His heart sped up. What did he know?
If Jesus knew, he hadn't given any indication. The other disciples were shocked at this heinous declaration. Over and over they kept saying, "Is it me? Is it me, Lord?"
It was sickening. Weak.
"He who has dipped his hand in the dish with me will betray me. The Son of Man goes as it is written of him, but woe to that man by whom the Son of Man is betrayed! It would have been better for that man if he had not been born."
He rolled his eyes. Please.
Uh-oh. Peter saw him. He was giving him a look. Clearing his throat, he asked Jesus the same question to keep up pretense. "Is it I, Rabbi?"
"You have said so."
He didn't look at Jesus, but reached out to dip his bread. Only to find another hand. Looking up, he saw Jesus' face studying his.
His irrational anger built once again. And he pushed away from the table at Jesus' next words.
"What you are going to do, do quickly."
Based on Matthew 26:20-25, John 13:21-30
I'm always struck when I read the accounts leading up to Jesus' death by one single thing!
EVERYONE COULD HAVE STOPPED IT!
Starting first and foremost with this. The disciples saw Jesus acknowledge Judas as his betrayer. They had been listening to Jesus talk about his death and resurrection for some time now. Why is it that nobody stopped him? They didn't even realize what was going on when Judas left the group.
"Now no one at the table knew why he said this to him. Some thought that, because Judas had the moneybag, Jesus was telling him, 'Buy what we need for the feast,' or that he should give something to the poor." John 13:28-29
But God didn't want it stopped. All this had to happen to fulfill Scripture. To give us a just Savior Who was not guilty, but willing to die for us anyways.
However, the point I want to make is that there are signs. When God does something on earth, He always tells His people first.
“For the Lord GOD does nothing without revealing his secret to his servants the prophets." Amos 3:7
In this case, quite literally.
I want to be the kind of follower of God, who understands what God is saying. I want to be in the know of what's going down. Even if I don't like it, I don't want to be blind to it. The disciples were completely oblivious to what was happening when Jesus had all but pointed and said, "This is the guy." While I understand why, I don't want to be like that in my walk with God.
When I walk into the middle of the conversation, I want to know what I missed. I will say "What? What?" more times then a broken record, but am I like that with God? When God stuff is going down, I don't want to be asking, "What is going on?"
I want to know. I want to understand. What about you?
V. Joy Palmer